Saturday, April 30, 2005


A few years ago, the family was on summer vacation in Northern Wisconsin. It had been very dry and hot, not typical weather for the region. Heading back to the cabin one afternoon, my youngest son announced, "My trout is dry."
After bursting out in laughter, I told him, "That's a bad thing for a fish, better put it in some water."
My son did not find any humor in this, and to this day, still adamantly denies that he said "trout" instead of "throat," despite the fact that the other three members of his family insist he did.

Saturday, April 09, 2005

My favorite Taoist quote

"Neither deviate from your instructions not hurry to finish." Do not force
things. It is dangerous to deviate from instructions or push for
completion. It takes a long time to do a thing properly. Once you do
something wrong, it may be too late to change it. Can you afford to be
Chuang Tzu, Inner Chapters

Another Embarrassing Story

My friend was attempting to vacuum some dead ants from around the front door of his house. They just wouldn't suck up the hose. He suspected a clog and took a look down the hose. Couldn't see anything wrong. So, he puts one end up to his mouth, and blows. Problem was, he had the other end turned toward his face. All the stuff clogging the hose comes out in a big puff, leaving him covered in dust and yuck.
Ever done a toatally stupid thing that you could have avoided if you had just thought about your actions for one more moment? I know I have.

Thursday, April 07, 2005

Embarrassing stories

I threatened my friends that I would post these stories once I got a blog. So here goes:

1. My friend was dating a woman who had put on considerable weight since the beginning of their relationship. One day, while sitting in line at a fast food restaurant, his cell phone rings. It's her. "Honey, I am thinking about buying some butt beads. Do you think I should?" she asks.
"Hey, if they make your ass look smaller, go ahead," was his reply.
Understandably, this response did not go over very well.

2. My favorite bartender, for some strange reason, was discussing her SO's underwear. "He has these holes in the ass area," she told me. "I asked him, 'What do you do at work, just sit around all day and blow farts as hard as possible out of your ass and rip holes in your shorts?'"

Initial Post

I would like to recommend to any and all who peruse this site a fun diversion. Go to:
if you are a fan of the comics in the newspaper. Josh's comments are roll on the floor amusing at times, and the comments are usually worth reading as well.